Just because I'm nine
by Myley
Summary: AU Rudolph and his family failed to become humans, and Rudolph must learn how hard it is to watch the one you love growing up and escaping you. Slash Rudolph/Tony. One Shot. Based on the song Creep by Radiohead.


Hello everyone! I've wanted to right stories about the little vampire so here we go! I had this idea thanks to Radiohead, Creep, and I hope you'll like Rudolph's monologue.

**Warning**: this fiction diverges from the original movie, here they **never** become humans. It also contains strong language and mature themes. There is also a **crossover** with some characters from Buffy the vampire slayer.

**Pairing**: one sided Rudolph/Tony **Slash**

I think I said it all. I just hope you'll like it ! Slash are few around ! And I wanted to something mature with the Sackville Bagg still vampires.

Enjoy!

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><p><span>JUST BECAUSE I'M NINE<span>

"My best friend's a vampire!"

I will always remember that sentence. It still echoes in my head like a thud. Probably because it was the very first time someone had ever considered me as a friend...

_**When you were here before  
>Couldn't look you in the eye<strong>_

To me, I was a monster. A non aging thing doomed to drinking living blood. Anyone would have run away that night, screamed, or taken advantage of my weakened state to kill me. But you did not. You offered me your help, your comfort and your warmth. You treated me like a person. I thought my nature would frighten you, but you were amazed by it; if only you knew how much you amazed me too, my sweet Tony. And you always will.

_**You're just like an angel  
>Your skin makes me cry<br>You float like a feather  
>In a beautiful world<strong>_

I love the warmth of your tan skin and the topaz of your sparkling eyes. The first time I touched you – when I took your hand to fly away – I so terribly felt the icy coldness of mine. You befriending me was even worse; I was a miracle to you, a shameful freak to me. This has never changed. But at the time, your were so innocent and pure and I was so dead and dirty. Yet, you never complained about my looks or skin temperature. You always had smiles for me. They would send a beat to my corpse heart.

You are one of a kind, Tony Thompson.

_**I wish I was special  
>You're so fuckin' special<strong>_

You did all your best to retrieve the stone but Rookery won in the end – even if he had died in his truck diving accident – and so the curse remained. I still remember your defeated face when the stone slid from your hand to sink into the dark ocean and disappear forever. The stone in the ocean; just like in your dreams... Maybe was it Destiny? Maybe was the stone not to be used? Lost in your temper you tried to dive in but I held you back. Many vampires blame me for that. They said that perhaps you might have found the stone and all would have been over. They say so even now, eleven years later. I never apologized, you had more chance to die in the icy dark and deep water than to find anything. Even Father agreed on that point. I acted by reflex: you were putting your life in danger, I protected you.

You are my everything. The sound of your beating heart is music to my ear.

**_But I'm a creep_**  
><strong><em>I'm a weirdo<em>**  
><strong><em>What the hell am I doing here?<em>**  
><strong><em>I don't belong here<em>**

You felt guilty for a long time. I remember holding you on that cliff for what felt like hours, rocking you back and forth, trying to soothe your pain. I wish I had held you with a warm and soft body, but you were comforted by the blueish corpse I remained.

**_I don't care if it hurts_**  
><strong><em>I want to have control<em>**  
><strong><em>I want a perfect body<em>**  
><strong><em>I want a perfect soul<em>**

Everything stayed the way it was before the stone night – save for the fouler temper of my fellows – but when you turned twelve, all that we had taken for granted left forever.

Your parents died in a car accident. The social worker wanted to put you in an orphanage but Mother and Father abhorred the very idea of it – we all did. So, you disappeared from the surface of the Earth to be kept in the darkness of my realm, with us, with me. You really became a sibling. You became the little Prince and every vampire knew that you were not to be touched. Mother is over-maternal with you and Father tends to be overprotective of you and growls at anything that'd come near you!

So I watched you growing up, my human friend, in a world of vampires.

_**I want you to notice when I'm not around  
>You're so fuckin' special<br>I wish I was special**_

As a boy, you were adorable but the more you aged the handsomer you became. A perfect masterpiece of smooth skin and muscle. You are a magnificence Tony, and you do know it, don't you? You are the jewel of our kind. A treasure. You always had a "thing" with vampires, even as a child, but when you grew up that charm increased. You put us under a spell. You can tame any vampire, even the most ferocious, just by the inhuman strength of your charisma. Anna looks at you with despair and sad eyes. I do my best to hide my pain, burring it deep inside.

For, not only did you become an exquisite, you also matured in age. Arrived the moment when you would hang out with Gregory instead of me. I was still your "best friend," but you were turning into a man and I look like a nine year old child. It's not a very good combination. You're closer to my older brother than me. You "tamed" him too. Oh, so well!

And then came the time for love; a moment Anna and I feared more than anything else. Female vampires drooled at your feet. I remember Father being very afraid for females or not, they were still vampires. And even though Mother tried to keep you acquainted with mortals, you only "have the hots" for vampires. And not any vampire...

_**But I'm a creep**_  
><em><strong>I'm a weirdo<strong>_  
><em><strong>What the hell I'm doing here?<strong>_  
><em><strong>I don't belong here<strong>_

You love darkness and you love danger. Your sensual eyes only notice the most dangerous species of our kind, the most deadly. Your first kiss will haunt me forever; with my own brother. "As an experiment" you just both said laughing. I can still see the two of you against that wall mixing your tongues together. And then Gregory bent to your neck and for a minute I was sure he would not do it. But he did. You let him sink his teeth into you and taste your sweet blood. And you sighted in _pleasure_, holding strongly onto him. That was utterly repulsive. It made me sick. We had a strong argument after that. I never forgave Greg for taking you away from me when he knew how much I loved you. You broke my heart in two. I have never felt so jealous in my entire existence. With the others I "can" handle, but not with my own older brother. I tasted the bitterness of betrayal that night.

You never dated Gregory though, it was just "to try."

Darla was your first lover. You were sixteen and she was known to be cruel and sadistic. Father strongly forbade the relationship (as he tried with any of your romantic relationships - but miserably failed), he was so afraid for you. But, magically – as always – Darla turned sugar with you. I've had to watch you flirt with the most beautiful creatures for a decade, the most feared vampires that ever existed.

_**Whatever makes you happy  
>Whatever you want<strong>_

I am too physically young for you and way too much gentle. I am the sweet, polite, comprehensive Rudolph. Rudolph the child friend.

But I could be rough for you, Tony. If only you knew how much I long for a taste of you, of all the dirty things I crave to do to you... You think I know nothing about sex because I'm just nine. Sweet, sweet naive Tony. I've been nine for three fucking centuries. I may look like a child, but all inside is all man guarantee. But I'm plotting in vain; your body and soul belong to the love of _your_ life, the crazy Drusilla, the insanity and cruelty incarnated. Is that why you love her so much? I imagine her hurting you, drinking from you. And I don't really feel angry about it, I'd rather say that I envy her. I envy all of them who had the privilege to taste and touch you.

Living with vampires has increased your passion for darkness and pain. There is no more light in you.

_**You're so fuckin special  
>I wish I was special<strong>_

I would gladly let you fuck me if you only thought of it possible. But you'll never see me as a potential lover, will you? I look at myself and it's not difficult to understand why. I am stuck in the body of a little boy forever, doomed to witness the life of the one I crave and will never have. Just because I'm nine.

_**But I'm a creep  
>I'm a weirdo<br>What the hell am I doing here?**_

You're sleeping right now, half covered by the sheet. Do you know the effect the view of your half naked god-like body has on me? I can see the glistening of sweat on your hot chest, rising and falling with each breath. I can see the veins throbbing in your neck. I can hear you heart beating and your blood boiling. Are you dreaming of your whore? Just a few steps and I too could taste you, I too could touch that beautiful warm skin. Sink into you and never let go.

I'm dead, but you make feel deader. Please Tony, look at me. See me. Let me drink, let me touch. Please, Tony.

Please.

_**I don't belong here**_  
><em><strong>I don't belong here<strong>_

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><p>I hope you liked it! I'm personally rather happy with myself!<p>

Don't forget to review kiddos! ^^


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